Sometimes I have a hard time explaining what I do for a living. I’m (at times) a writer, so this should be a fairly legitimate concern.
When I tell people I work for a company that makes hot rod parts they either give me a blank stare, or proceed to ask more questions than I’m usually prepared to answer at a casual Sunday cookout.
The standard, honest answer is that I love my job. I learn something new every day, and I enjoy traveling the country as part of the circus that is the hot rod show scene. That’s not to say there aren’t some downsides.
Below are some of the confessions I don’t share when I give my standard small talk response. I’ll call it an open letter because there are too many lists on the Internet.
Don’t assume I like your car, or even the same cars as you.
Unlike many show attendees, I don’t have silver hair or a Hawaiian shirt collection. I do love cars, but have allegiances to none. Just because you’re a Ford guy that hates Chevy, or a Chevy guy that hates Ford doesn’t mean I am too.
Odds are my next project won’t have been made by either of those manufacturers, because I hear about them all the time at work. Rubin Carter didn’t want to talk about boxing on his off time, and I don’t want to build a Camaro, Mopar or ‘32 Roadster. That’s not to say I don’t respect these vehicles for what they are. I also fully recognize the fact that their existence is what allows me to feed and clothe myself.
Not every show is a swap meet.
I’m sure you drive a terribly hard bargain with the guy selling bolts and vacuum hoses, but I’m not there to pay for my hotel room with a pile of merchandise on a folding table. You should probably check if I even have inventory on hand before asking me about my show specials.
In fact, telling you I have nothing to sell you is one of my favorite things about attending shows on behalf of a major manufacturer. I’ll happily answer your questions all day, but when you get that maniacal, “It’s barginin’ time!” grin, I love shutting you down….especially when you’re persistent. It almost makes me wish I was born a woman so I could know the joys of dating with that mindset. It must be glorious.
Most of the foot traffic we see on Sunday is a waste of time.
Sunday comes with an assumption. This assumption is that you aren’t actually listening to the answers to your questions. Sunday is often the final show day, so my time consists mostly of dealing with bargain hunters (see above) or catalog collectors. I’ve probably mentally checked out because I’m sick of eating at chain restaurants and sleeping in hotels.
Your project is new to you, but you’re not reinventing the wheel.
There is no way to type that sentence without sounding like the ultimate cynic. The same goes for this one- I probably know the answer to the next question you’re going to ask before it comes out of your mouth.
A little debate is fine, but questioning every statement and aspect of our product is a waste of my time and yours. Odds are whatever you’re building is something that has been done hundreds (if not thousands) of times. If I make a suggestion, my input is based on a combination of product knowledge, experience and the feedback of countless customers who have actually used our stuff.
Innovation drives all facets the car world, but trying to be different for the sake of being difficult doesn’t do much for me. I may banter for a few minutes, but if we’re busy I’d much rather help people willing to listen.
I’m here to talk cars, not discuss your ideas for tax reform.
If Mark Twain said it, I’m not going to be able to improve on the statement.
“It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those 3 unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.”
I don’t care about your politics, nor do I want to hear you rant for 30 minutes. Please don’t make me a sounding board.
I’m using you for a social experiment.
I let the freebie items on the table dwindle until there is only one left, then wait to see how long it takes for someone to remove our last remaining piece. This almost always takes a surprisingly long time, and it’s hilarious to see the combination of want and advance guilt wash over someone. This phenomenon is one of the things that affirms my faith in mankind.
I really do enjoy helping people.
I get why some teachers love teaching. Watching a something “click,” or introducing a person to a new concept is one of the most satisfying things in life…. as is the ability to generate excitement. This is one of the most satisfying parts of my job, and the day it goes away is the day I stop wanting to do shows. Thankfully, I don’t think this will happen.